I don't date much. Okay, I don't really date at all! But lately as I've met some men that I started getting to know, or really want to get to know, I find myself feeling almost frozen with adronitis:
Adronitis n. frustration with how long it takes to
get to know someone—spending the first few weeks chatting in their
psychological entryway, with each subsequent conversation like entering a
different anteroom, each a little closer to the center of the house—wishing
instead that you could start there and work your way out, exchanging your
deepest secrets first, before easing into casualness, until you’ve built up
enough mystery over the years to ask them where they’re from, and what they do
for a living.
Have you ever experienced this same frustration? Let's skip the surface and just dive down deep into the heart of a person, the heart of issues, the true and unhidden soul. Was this ever a regular practice in the art of conversation, or has it always started as it does today with the very basic, boring facts of where you're from and what you do? I long for the kind of connection and community that only comes from knowing more about the person in front of you than what they'd write on a resume.
