As the title of this post reminds me, jealousy is not an attractive characteristic. Unfortunately, I've been faced with this ugly side of myself several times in the last 10 days. While I would like to try and excuse my behavior with creative and colorful stories or woes, I must simply face the truth. Jealousy is not pretty and jealousy (in this context) shouldn't be a part of my life.
Dallas is known for being a very materialistic city. I've always noticed this, but this could be the first time that I've felt the panic and fear of not having what I want--which leads to a desperate notion that I would do almost anything to get what I want. Just typing these words are making me cringe in disgust! I'm normally very good at "living simply, so others may simply live," so I'm not sure what caused the change.
Perhaps it was a loss of focus and perspective. When I begin to lose my desire to live simply and get caught up in the monetary and temporary things around me, especially in comparison to everyone I'm surrounded by, I begin to sound angry and bitter that I don't have what I want. Or worse, I begin throwing judgment and negativity on those who have things I would like in order to make myself feel better. My perspective on these things should be different because of my limited monetary resources and, more importantly, my beliefs about living as a Christ-follower.
So this week I feel the need to make sacrifices and pray boldly for the deliverence of envy and reminder that my dreams and desires call me beyond the issues of clothing, furniture, decorations, jewelry, vacations, iPhones, and pets. I want my life to be filled with conversations on the things of God and activities that aren't self-serving.
If anyone else is feeling the same wave of envy or discontentment that comes from focusing too much on materialism, or even if you're just beginning to observe that most of the "drama" and conversations in your life are centered on *stuff*--I hope that the Lord reminds you, like He did for me, that it's all meaningless.
"Then I observed that most people are motivated to success because they envy their neighbors. But this, too, is meaningless—like chasing the wind." - Ecclesiastes 4:4
Life has more to offer than more closet space to hold our junk--so I don't know about you, but I'm going to go out there and work towards a life free from materialism, envy, and judgment. I'd rather be know for having a spirit of love, abandon, and generosity.
3 comments:
I, too, struggle with things like this! This was very encouraging!!! Thank you!
Been there (am there still) and yes, it's ugly! Thanks for this post, sweet Katie!
Love you!
-Grace
One of my favorite sermons ever heard on the tenth commandment talked about coveting what your neighbor had as being the "definition" of jealousy; admitting to yourself that you covet or are jealous because what you have is not good enough. God wants us to like the person we see in the mirror, and be happy with ourselves. If you can avoid jealousy or coveting, you make it easier to find happiness, and you can follow his commandment.
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