I'm in India

I leave tomorrow for a trip to India. I'll be working with TruthSeekers International (learn more here) to reach out to the low-caste Indians near New Delhi. Please pray that lives are changed and hope is restored through the songs, testimonies, scripture, and footwashing ceremonies that I will be a part of.

My specific prayer requests are:

Practically: Please pray that travel goes smoothly (getting to India and buses/trains within India), that I will be healthy, and that I'll remember to pack everything I need (snacks, clothing, medications, host gifts, etc.).

Emotionally: Pray that I will remember the social and gender issues of the Indian culture and act appropriately. Pray that I will be able to "cope" with the poverty I’ll see. And, finally, pray that I and the rest of my team of 8 will connect well with each other and the local Indian Truthseekers Staff.

Spiritually: Please pray that, despite the hopeless situations I might see, I will be given words of hope to share with the low caste Indians I meet; that I won't become discouraged or frustrated by my inability to change their circumstances. That God shows me more of Him.

I look forward to recovering from jet lag next weekend by spending time processing what I saw and learned in India. I will definitely post those thoughts here with some photos too.

Please eat a huge turkey dinner for me and enjoy the time with your family and friends celebrating all that we have to be thankful for. Happy Thanksgiving!

Hebrews 7:25, NLT

Therefore He is able, once and forever, to save those who come to God through Him. He lives forever to intercede with God on their behalf.

I have never had to walk to my school or walk to my job.
I've never been deprived of dignity on a daily basis.
I have never been considered low-caste.
I have never felt true hunger.
I've never been without a bed to sleep in.
I have never lived in a crammed shack.
I've never really known hopelessness.

Can a few Westerners going to the neighborhoods in and around New Delhi really make a difference? Can our hands washing their feet really restore hope in a broken society, fully of bondage? I believe the answer is yes because - although I have never - HE IS ABLE.

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Thanks Friends!

Jeremiah 1:4-8, NLT

The Lord gave me this message:

“I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb.
Before you were born I set you apart
and appointed you as my prophet to the nations.”

“O Sovereign Lord,” I said, “I can’t speak for you! I’m too young!”

The Lord replied, “Don’t say, ‘I’m too young,’ for you must go wherever I send you and say whatever I tell you. And don’t be afraid of the people, for I will be with you and will protect you. I, the Lord, have spoken!”

Most of the time, these is the same words that I hear God telling me. I'm not saying that I'm a prophet like Jeremiah, I'm saying that I feel called to share God's love with people - all the time. I sometimes think that I'm too young to achieve the dreams that I have, but God has always used people of various ages to spread His message.

Tonight I was feeling emotionally empty because of the hectic schedule I've had. I feel ready for the trip to India, but I just needed a boost. Thankfully, these verses came to me and I once again feel refreshed with new vigor from the Lord as I read His Word and see His plans for me can only be accomplished because He is with me.

A timely word, a hopeful word, a promising word, a prophetic word, a blessed word, an encouraging word, a healing word--Your words, Lord, are a balm for my soul. Thank you.

Insecurities

Bleh. I hate insecurities. I suppose they remind me that I am human and not an infallible being. You might not realize how much this blog is an insecurity for me. It's all my secrets and thoughts and dreams submitted to cyberspace for anyone to read. Yikes! Half the time, when or if I go back and read past posts, I want to delete them because I read it and think "that was stupid - why did I write that?". But I don't delete them. (I can't say the same for some of my facebook statuses or tweets though, haha!)

Whoever reads this, thank you for not telling me that what I write is ridiculous. I don't want false compliments, but I am really insecure about my writing - even though I love to write and think that it will remain a big part of my life for years to come. And, strangely enough, I'm not sure that I want to overcome this insecurity. It keeps me humble and keeps me authentic with what I write.

But I still hate insecurities. Raw emotions of any kind usually overwhelm and intimidate me. Goodness knows I'm going to be a mess one day when I fall in love. Ick!

In the meantime, I'm going to try and remain emotionally healthy, even if it means acknowledging certain insecurities that are here to stay. I'm going to remember that God never changes and in God alone I can be confident.

Lamentations 3:19-24, The Message

I'll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness,

the taste of ashes, the poison I've swallowed.

I remember it all—oh, how well I remember—

the feeling of hitting the bottom.

But there's one other thing I remember,

and remembering, I keep a grip on hope:

God's loyal love couldn't have run out,

his merciful love couldn't have dried up.

They're created new every morning.

How great your faithfulness!

I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over).

He's all I've got left.

Genesis 22:14, NLT

Abraham named the place Yahweh-Yireh (which means “the Lord will provide”). To this day, people still use that name as a proverb: “On the mountain of the Lord it will be provided.”

One of the many things I remember from my years in Sunday school and bible memorization programs for students is the study I did in high school on the names of God. Jehovah-Jireh is the one I remember the most as I have always felt it was the name/characteristic of God that was easiest for me to grasp.

God has been good to me by providing for my needs. Perhaps not always in the drastic way that He did for Abraham in the Old Testament, but nonetheless, I have very little needs in this temporary world and I credit that blessing to my heavenly Father.

I'm preparing to leave for India this week and wondering at how my privileged American mindset will handle the concept of a God who is a Provider and the face that I will be faced with drastic physical needs in a way I never have before.

Does God really provide for those people? Can I really tell them that my God (who has blessed me with a nice car, apartment, and job) wants to provide for them without getting their expectations to out-of-wack?

I suppose God's characteristic of being a Provider isn't as easy to understand as I first thought.

Lord, please teach me to understand that Your provision doesn't always mean comfort, stress-free living, and bills that are paid. Please allow me to have a broken heart for the needs of this world so that I don't become faithless and doubt that You are Who you say You are - a Provider. Thank you for tearing down my haughtiness and continually molding me. Allow me to use my resources to join in your Team of Provision. Thank you for the opportunity to join You in what You're doing around the world.

Exodus 3:12, NLT

God answered, “I will be with you."

Have you ever been in the place where you need confirmation? You doubt your work, your image, and your location - you might ask God for a sign to let you know that you're where He wants you to be. Some days we don't get that sign, some days are dark with discouragement.

I remember when I lived in Ireland there were a few days like that. I was doing volunteer youth work in Belfast with Youth for Christ and sometimes missed the comfort of being "home" in a place with other Americans and my favorite food. Thankfully, those days were truly few and far between -- I've doubt what I'm doing more since I returned to Texas than ever before.

You'd think that in my home country I would find comfort, but almost every day I'm asking God to confirm why I am here and why I'm doing what I am. It's not what I thought it would be. It's not bad - please don't get me wrong, I'm very blessed - but it's just different and my spirit isn't satisfied.

The good news is that God is with me. Overseas, in Texas, in my car, in my cubicle - He's there. And sometimes, when discouragement comes like the rain, God comes like the rainbow to remind us that we are where He wants us to be.

"Lord you have permitted me to experience the joy of Your purposeful, promising presence. Even on days when I doubt, help me know that wherever I am, I can share that joy with those who are homesick."

Remembrance Day

I'm not usually political in my posts, but doesn't everyone have some patriotic pride emerge on Veterans Day? I won't get too bogged down with jargen or hype because it annoys when I see other people feel the need to jump on the "oh yeah, thanks vets" wagon in terms of facebook statuses and twitter updates. I guess I really shouldn't be so skeptical of their intentions.

For an interesting perspective on this day, also known as Remebrance Day in other countries, please read my cousin Phoebe's blog. Click here. She is currently studying at Oxford and has learned a new perspective about this "holiday." I remember the somber significance of Remembrance Day when I lived in Ireland and I was grateful to read Phoebe's post for the reminder that Veterans Day is about more than sales and parades.

All I want to say really is that I'm extremely grateful for the sacrifices that have been made by my family members to serve our country. My cousin Cory (active Marine) and his wife and three children; my Uncle Steve. My deceased family members: great-Grandpa Colonel Herbert Gish (Army) and his family who was at home while he served in WWI and WWII; Great-Great-Uncle Milton (Army); Great-Great-Aunt Mildred (Navy); and my much loved Grandad Frank Anderson (Army) and my Grandma Mary Jo for supporting him from home during WWII.

Here is a picture of my Grandad in France during WWII. I'm very proud.

A Constant Frustration

This is a little sidetrack from my current theme of "encouragement." I was out-of-town and unplugged from technology this weekend and will soon resume my normal posts. However, at the moment, I'm distracted by my heart's scuffle with emotions of confusion, anger, and frustration.

You see, I have the priviledge of being a friend and/or mentor to many ladies in Dallas. Some a little older, most younger, I keep hearing the same statements and questions in conversations:

"I don't feel anything anymore."

"How can I actually do anything for the Lord? What do I have to offer?"

"Life sucks. What's the point?"

"Why aren't I happy?"

"How come God hasn't given me what I want?"

"I don't know what I believe anymore - I'm so confused."

"This isn't what I thought it was going to be like."

Most of the time I don't have the gumption to tell them, bluntly, what I think is true on the subject. I believe that we let ourselves get discouraged when we stress about how to fit God in our lives or when we can schedule a "quiet time" and get it crossed off our to-do list. God can't and shouldn't be orchestrated. This becomes religion and religion isn't what God wants.

No wonder we feel distant from God when we work so hard to do the things we think will make us feel better. All we have to do is live life, the kind of life God wants us to live, and include Him in every aspect.

Isaiah 1:13-17, The Message translation

"Quit your worship charades. I can't stand your trivial religious games: Monthly conferences, weekly Sabbaths, special meetings—meetings, meetings, meetings—I can't stand one more! Meetings for this, meetings for that. I hate them! You've worn me out! I'm sick of your religion, religion, religion, while you go right on sinning. When you put on your next prayer-performance, I'll be looking the other way. No matter how long or loud or often you pray, I'll not be listening. And do you know why? Because you've been tearing people to pieces, and your hands are bloody. Go home and wash up. Clean up your act. Sweep your lives clean of your evildoings so I don't have to look at them any longer. Say no to wrong. Learn to do good. Work for justice. Help the down-and-out. Stand up for the homeless. Go to bat for the defenseless. "

So there.

Colossians 3:2, New Living Translation

Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth.

As "things above" and "things below" are obviously contrary one to the other, both cannot be followed together. It's a difficult choice to make as a disciple of Christ; heaven or the world, sacrifice or comfort? Actually, that probably isn't correct. I just realized as I typed that that I assume choosing things of the world means comfort. That isn't true - the world has pain and no one is exempt from it. That said, it isn't a field of daisies when you follow God, either. We get many blessings from following Christ, but a perfect life isn't promised.

Ultimately, what I learned from this verse tonight is that I have made a wonderful choice in choosing Christ and I need to see every thing (good or bad) through an eternal perspective and as a blessing an opportunity to learn and grow.

Father, why do I often equate blessings with comfort, health, and pleasant circumstances? I so want to count as blessings the difficult moments and happenings as well. Please continue to give me gentle reminders of contentment through the examples of those I encounter who "live simply, so others may simply live." Amen.

James 1:12, NLT

God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.

It's ironic that this was the verse I read tonight because earlier to day I read a blog (which I love because it's harshly authentic and quite controversial) about the author's strong feelings against a new book about to be published by a "prosperity gospel" figure. I won't reveal who either of these people are because it's not relevant.

As you (hopefully) know, this verse from James isn't promising us wealth, health, or the answers to our problems. In fact, this verse doesn't even promise an end to the testings and temptations of life. - insert depressing music here - But I believe that there is encouragement found in these words. These words are ultimately the definition of perseverance. Bearing under the load, not being freed from it.

As Christians, our ability to persevere is different from those who don't know God. We can continue to walk through trails and trust that God will remain faithful and trustworthy to give us strength to stand up again when we fall. Share this hope with someone today.

Father, when the cares of this world weigh me down, You see me through to a new day. I praise and thank You for Your Holy Spirit whose encouragement inspires me to persevere through difficult experiences. Amen.

Proverbs 12:25, NLT

Worry weighs a person down;
an encouraging word cheers a person up.

Obviously the current theme of my blog is encouragement and verses that relate to it. I never really thought of myself as a worrier but life of late has revealed my worrisome side. Thankfully my worry isn't where my next meal comes from or where I'll sleep each night. But worry still does tend to reflect in my eyes and my attitude. This proverb is accurate that an encouraging word can cheer a person up. I'm always eager to have someone give me a cheerful word (I wish it happened more often!) and make the day seem brighter. I also like being the deliverer of that encouraging word that cheers someone up!

This blog seems kinda pointless and meaningless tonight but I'm trying hard to blog every night. It's been a couple months since my blogging was regular and I miss it. Thanks for bearing with me through the slower nights when my brain is tired!

Hebrews 10:24, NLT

Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works.

At a church small group leaders meeting tonight we talked about the mission of our groups. While the description of my group (below) could qualify as a mission statement, I think this verse from Hebrews better describes what the overall purpose of our meeting each week is about.

We are a women-only small group; a fun mix of women in their 20s who meet weekly in central Dallas. We represent a unique blend of careers, hair colors, and hobbies. But with all that aside, we come together each week as a community of appreciated individuals to share, learn and serve with one another as we seek to deepen our relationships with God.

Looking at it now, the verse and the description say the same thing (more or less). Overall, the main point is that we know why we meet each week. We want to motivate and encourage each other to know God better and to incorporate His love in our daily actions.

I just learned that I need to prepare a short message to share during the footwashing events for my upcoming trip to India. I need to speak from the Word and center on either a parable, God's desire to release people from captivity, or God's love. Basically, I need to apply the mission of my small group to this mission trip - encourage others and motivate them to accept and live out God's love.

In that mindset, it's a different picture in Dallas than it will be in New Delhi. But I'm hopeful that I will be used by God to encourage (both here and there), and also that God will use His people around the world to encourage me. More than anything, I hope God's heart will be pleased by all that He sees His hands doing through mine and those on my team and those in my small group.

James 1:2-4, New Living Translation

For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.

This used to be one of my favorite passages of scripture because it encouraged me as I struggled with things. Now I'm not so sure that I like it because I've come further in life and realized that there is always a struggle and always a test to my faith. Sometimes I just get so tired of it and want a break. But I know there isn't a break on this earth from pain and struggle. My spirit gets so tired of these "growth opportunities" and wants to just finally be at home with the Lord.

Jesus, please come home soon so that I can sit at Your feet all day and have no more toil or grief. I know it's nothing I deserve but that You have promised it to me. I love You and hope that my meager offerings and pitiful faith can somehow make You proud until Your return.